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Set up a meeting with your DJ or bandleader to discuss the timeline and details of your reception. This meeting should be a collaborative effort, with a free exchange of ideas, feedback and guidance.  Provide them with a must-play list and a do-not-play list. 

The must-play list should be inclusive of all the songs that have meaning to you and that you absolutely love, but the list should be kept as short as possible. You do not want to micromanage the music. Instead of handing them a ten page song list, let the DJ or bandleader know the genres you are interested in hearing throughout your reception. Your DJ or bandleader should be able to read the crowd and react to your guests and select songs accordingly. 

The do-not-play list should include all the songs & genres that you find cheesy, cliché, and absolutely hate, as well as songs that may have inappropriate lyrics or subject matter.

In addition to your must-play and do-not-play lists you will need to provide the DJ or bandleader with your song selections for any key dances or traditions such as, your first dance, parent dances, and cake cutting. You should also let your DJ or bandleader know if you are open to them taking requests from guests.

If your DJ or bandleader will also be emceeing the event they will be responsible for keeping the flow of your reception moving smoothly and informing your guests of what is going on. You will need to provide them with the specifics on when you want them to talk (i.e. introductions, toasts, bouquet toss, etc.) and what they should say (i.e. names, pronunciations, relationship to bride & groom, etc.)


 
 
As you start your search for a DJ or band recall weddings that you have been to in the past. Are there any DJs or bands that stand out in your mind? If so add them to your list of candidates. As usual, also ask family and friends for recommendations. A quick way to narrow down your list of potential DJs and bands is to search online for videos of their performances. If you like what you see, set up an appointment to meet with the DJ or bandleader.

When you meet with a potential DJ or band, explain what you are looking for in terms of musical selections and the ambience you want to create. Be specific. Let them know what makes you dance, what has special meaning to you, and what music you absolutely do not want to hear. They should show interest and offer ideas on how they can make your vision come alive.  The DJ or bandleader should have a good personality and you should feel confident that they will be able to interact with your guests, read the room and select music accordingly.

 
DJ vs. Band 12/05/2009
 
Which do you choose? Here are some things to consider before making your decision:

Size – A DJ is much more compact than a band and takes up less real estate. If your reception will be in a small intimate space then a 12-piece band probably won’t fit. However you can reduce the number of pieces in the band to fit your space.

Cost – A DJ typically costs much less than a band. However, a DJ that comes with all the bells and whistles (i.e. lighting, giveaways, plasma screens, etc.) can be just as expensive as a smaller band. Also, keep in mind you are expected to provide a meal for all of your vendors so when making your decision factor in the cost of vendor meals, as it can get expensive feeding a 12 piece band.

Repertoire – Generally a DJ will be able to play a wider variety of music that spans across all generations and genres. However, a good band will be able to cover anything from disco, to R&B, to today’s top 40.

Breaks – Both a band and a DJ will need to take breaks throughout your reception but with a DJ their breaks tend to go unnoticed.  When a band takes a break it’s much more obvious and can disrupt the flow of the party. However, you can request that the band play continuous live music and have the band members stagger their breaks so that there is always at least one member of the band playing. If continuous live music is not an option request that the band’s breaks coordinate with the natural flow and breaks of the reception (i.e. toasts, serving of meals, etc.)

Entertainment – Bands tend to have that “wow” factor because they are a group of entertainers constantly engaging guests while they perform. However, a DJ with a charismatic stage presence can compensate for that and keep the party going just as well.
 
 
Music can make or break a wedding reception. Surveys show 63%* of wedding guests did not remember what they had for dinner, but they did remember the entertainment. 

The music at your reception should inspire your guests and set the tone for the rest of your event. Determine what type(s) of music will suit your personal taste, as well as what music you feel your guests will enjoy. Once you have determined the style(s) of music you want played, determine how that music will be delivered. By live band, a DJ or a combination of the two.



*Source: The DJ Sales & Marketing Handbook, by Stacy Zemon